Question

These girls made it to a higher education institution. They have to have some brains, right? We can't all be little candy Smarties, but we at least have to be half a Smarty, right?
I don't understand the fad with these new balloon short thingies on campus. It's like a virus among the female population. They're all over the place. They're these little Adidas shorts that are made from that kind of windbreaker material. I assume they're running shorts. They all look like they were put on backwards, and they all look like they were made for people with asses. Therefore, they accentuate the fact that these stick figures don't have asses by being all saggy in the back. According to all the guys I've talked to - it's very unattractive.
However, nobody has told the roves of women walking around. The guys at Double Dave’s counted 57 Adidas shorts walking into the store in a three hour period recently; all the same style, just in a myriad of different colors. They're doing a study. They made me swear, under intense scrutiny, that I didn't have a pair of the monstrosities and that I wouldn't go out and buy any. I seriously didn't think guys cared that much.
I was mildly annoyed by seeing these shorts everywhere, but ultimately I didn't care because it made me look that much better than all the delusional beauties walking around. (Yes, I am that vain. Every woman is. We just lie to you about it.) But now I've witnessed the utmost stupidity. A cold front came in. Instead of finally, finally casting off a fad that should have been cast off long ago (sort of like the entire 80's wardrobe), the masses have evolved. Now I see them wearing long sleeved shirts, jackets, and . . . these shorts and sandals. Did we just miss something here?
You’re shivering from the cold airflow circulating in the back of your itty bitty saggy shorts, and yet you are determined to stick to fashion. That's perseverance, right there. If they applied that to their education, we'd probably have a metric shitton more graduates here.
This is population genetics without a control at its very finest. Natural selection does not apply due to delusion. (Can you tell I'm a biology major?) It started with one little girl who saw some shorts in a store that her boyfriend said looked good on her (due to self-preservation, no doubt). She met another girl, who began with "O-M-G! Those are so cute!" and went to buy a pair. Generation 1. That girl went to a party, talked to billions of her little bimbo friends, and Generation 2 was exponentially larger than Generation 1. It proceeds from there. It's sort of like Johnson grass. It's fucking unstoppable.
Eventually something that actually looks good will come along. I'm only hoping. Until then, I'm going to sit back and laugh my not-quite-so-tiny ass off.